I don't really talk to much about my religion/faith on here. I guess I just find that crazy things my kids do to be more interesting! :) But I am going to share something with you. Now I realize that not all of you who read this are Mormon. So you can feel free to skip this post....
When I found out I was pregnant, I was very happy& excited. But also racked with guilt. At the time, Ivan had hardly been in school and we were still struggling with how to help him. He had a lot of struggles at the time. I felt guilty because I kept wondering how could I give to another child, when my other 4 are not getting all that they need? Then of course, bring on the morning sickness and I really wasn't good to anyone! :)
So while I was feeling physically & emotionally..."spent" I still had a lot of things on my plate. Cub Scouts, Girl Scouts, church, babysitting, not to mention that it was the holidays! ( Apparently I forgot to send my Mom a family picture in her Christmas card...at least she got one I guess!)I felt a huge burden.
For a while now I have been talking about clearing my schedule and how busy we are. But I honestly didn't know what to do about it. Maybe because "I" was trying to figure it out. I want to be the best Mom & wife that I can be, but I knew that I was failing miserably. I prayed. And I prayed. I was emotional, tired, frustrated etc.
I am so grateful that even though I don't have all the answers, I can pray to someone who does! Today I recieved a call from Ivan's teacher. He has made such huge strides, that he will now only be recieving two days of services. His speech therapy has been completely stopped because they feel that he doesn't have a problem with language at all. He is making such progress. He has also been declared "not severe enough" to need summer school. He is now only in school on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Leaving me 3 days during the week to get all those things done that I have been slacking on. That I have needed help on...that I struggled with.
I have had a lot of experiences with the Lord answering my prayers. However this time it just means so much more. I was wondering why I got pregnant if I couldn't handle it. Now I know that when we follow the Lord and do what he asks, we will be blessed. He will make sure that we are getting what we need.